Confession #5

This confession is short and sweet.  Not too deep but I need to vent as I sit here wide awake - past midnight - in bed with my computer.  Somewhere in Oklahoma Steph is rolling her eyes.  Ohmigod Paula is still a geek, she is saying.

Here we go--

Confession #5:  I am miserable at shifting gears.  

When inspiration hits me, watch out.  If it hits just right I can work and work and work and work.  Obsessed.  Tonight I ate dinner at my computer which was only possible because my dear husband cooked it for me.  He also did homework, the bedtime routine, and dishes.  I get Obsessed.  Addicted to my work.  And, now I reminded, I am totally prone to insomnia.  Don't worry.  I don't mean "up for days" here.  I am not going to go Britney on "ya'll".  But I am soooo excited about my photo shoot with Brie today - and my new series City Dog - I am brimming with great ideas and new locations for dogs and kids and future city dog shoots with Brie and other dogs and even Roger and Evan and anything else that my mind races and is going a mile a minute and I just can't seem to shut it off.......  Miserable!  I lay here thinking about lighting and HDR and how to handle glass glare and where to go with an 18 month old that does NOT have any drab grass. I close my eyes and begin to photoshop all my captures.  I try to relax but all I can see are vignettes and is it really possible to make a catchlight brush??  Isn't that just cheating?  I would NEVER cheat! HMPF!  I never have been good at shifting gears.  Just as I can't shift gears to fall asleep I also can't shift gears to wake up.  Because here it is well past midnight and I am going to be dragging in the morning.  As it is I am NOT put together in the morning at kindergarten drop off.  Some moms have it all together first thing in the morning - nice hair and clothes and make up - and I am not one of them.  No, I will not hit the shower until well after I return home for a second cup of coffee.  Until then it is the same running pants, fake Uggs, and a YMCA tee with a ratty gray sweater.  Every Single Morning.  Picked up from off the floor approximately 30 minutes before we have to be out the door.  Drag the kid out of bed who wants to get up as little as I do.  Harass him to get dressed as I am rushing to pull on my sad outfit.  Drag him out of bed three times since he keeps climbing back in and putting the covers over his head.  Unbrushed ratty hair and dark circles (on me AND him).  Coffee breath - me. Milk breath - him.  It is just not a cute sight.  Maybe typing a little will make me sleepy and force me to stop staring at my photos.  I am really trying here.  I will note that I intended this to be short and sweet and yet I keep typing... I think I may be starting to snooze....

p.s.  If you ARE reading this Steph - I am thinking of you and that big belly!  Any time now!!!!